What could be hotter than dipping your naked hide in water infused with chlorine and urine, while a pool noodle bobs obscenely along with your ungainly and hard-to-maintain humping? Or, to be less subtle, they were riding each other like show ponies instead of piloting the ship around things like islands. Well, you should at least know the dangers of these fantasy sex locations before you get drunk enough to try it. Every summer, beaches around the country get shut down due to high bacteria levels in the water. Some of it is just good old fashioned human effluence. Then again, they also named a drink the Duck Fart. But recent research by some scientists has shown that sand, awesome filter of filth that it is, can collect big, fatty loads of that bacteria with the ebb and flow of tides. You ever tried pissing while totally drunk?
Now, since this isn't the article to investigate this particular phenomenon, check out next week to read "7 Reasons Men Are Better Than Women at Pooping" , we'll just focus on the gross and dangerous parts: What could be hotter than dipping your naked hide in water infused with chlorine and urine, while a pool noodle bobs obscenely along with your ungainly and hard-to-maintain humping? Prioritizing while humping on a boat is something you may want to look into, however. On a smaller scale, there's plenty of evidence including ghetto video on ebaum's world to support the fact that small boats don't take well to rocking and general hump-like motions and will, in fact, sink your ass if you try such things. Microorganisms are the third leading cause of death behind heart attacks and cancer, so you may not want to rub your juicy parts all over the nightclub bathroom counter after all. Naturally, the cops told her the penalty for that, after which she quickly pointed out that her boyfriend was driving and she was going down on him. Some of it is just good old fashioned human effluence. Every month magazines like Cosmo, Playboy and Boob Fancy write up some titillating article about places you just have to have sex at least once in your life. It's so popular they even named a drink after it. In any event, it's still a popular motif in film and books, lying out on the sand under the stars while the waves crash behind you and your special friend as you engage in briny coitus. So while you're motor boating your lady friend and your hand hits a patch of goo on the arm rest, don't say we didn't warn you, Mr. Every summer, beaches around the country get shut down due to high bacteria levels in the water. Plane-sex is the only item on this list that combines the reckless risks of having sex in a car with the potential diseases of having sex in a nightclub. The bottom line is, you're boning on top of the urine and poo of hundreds of strangers. D would like you to know that when you have sex underwater you're probably apt to lose track of some important things like buoyancy, which means you could end up floating to the surface quicker then you'd planned and giving yourself an embolism. That explanation was never made official, but citing human error as the reason an experienced crew simply plowed into an island and caused two people to die is probably not going to be very convincing to a lot of people. We're gonna be internet stars! Continue Reading Below 8 A Pool For those too lazy to get to the beach or too fearful of an incident involving jellyfish and taint, there's the semi-thrill of sex in a swimming pool. Bacteria like bacillus cereus have been found in some theaters which is known to cause quick, sexy bouts of diarrhea. Continue Reading Below Advertisement As anyone who's ever had sex on the beach probably already knows, if you're not extremely careful you're going to discover what it feels like to exfoliate areas of your body that don't need to be exfoliated. Continue Reading Below Advertisement Aside from all the hideous and obvious downsides to cab sex, there's always the chance you'll end up on some site like taxicams. All of them seem to operate on the Hollywood idea that having sex while, say, zooming down the Pacific Coast Highway on a motorcycle is well worth the risks involved. Of course, if filth doesn't frighten you, the law is on to your little plan as well and has been since the early 's, so you're not fooling anyone by sitting in the back row. According to research by the University of California, Santa Barbara, even a chlorinated pool can have enough bacteria to get forced inside you and lead to yeast infections and urinary tract infections. The same stall where a nightclub full of tanked strangers have been visiting all night.
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