What have you come to understand are the origins of your sex addiction? I had all this anger directed at wanting to save my mother and defeat my father. And in my mixed up thinking thought I could do that sexually. It remains a central part of my recovery work today. He was terribly violent and for some strange reason, I took on the role of standing up to him and often bearing the brunt of his violence while no one in the family stepped-in or defended me from it. I know I am powerless over addiction, so one day at a time makes me more responsible to do everything I can do to stay honest and work the steps and choose to bear the hard stuff that I used to act-out over.
Of course it didn't and later I realized a lot of my inability to get completely sober in SAA was because I wasn't working on my co-dependency. So in describing my sex addiction, I would say that I have been able to let go of all my problem behaviors without great difficulty but struggled to achieve abstinence with masturbation with those fantasies. I was angry and refused. He was also a high functioning alcoholic. But it was all deeply influenced by the control and rage-based fantasy world which started in my childhood. When he left and I never heard from him again I came crashing down. How did you know it was an addiction? I don't believe I can promise never to have a relapse, and that is not about having one foot out the door or making excuses. I have seen a tremendous increase in attendance in the conference call, women-only meetings but perhaps that still suggests we women are afraid to go to face to face meetings? I was never going to let a man or anyone have power over me and I was never going to let anyone's anxiety intrude on me - at least that was my power fantasy, which of course isn't - and wasn't - reality. What have you come to understand are the origins of your sex addiction? I am currently sober and have been for some time, one day at a time. Unfortunately my concern about power was not just with men but in all areas of my life and these issues kept me from being close and intimate with family, friends, and my partner. My addiction started in early childhood, and later was obscured by the acting-out I was doing with men. This is when I have lost my grip on the "here and now," and I confuse where I am powerless and where I have power. She asked to remain anonymous for the sake of her privacy; she used the pseudonym "Nora. I think my anger saved me but it became eroticized and the root of my sex addiction. I believe that its origin was in my early childhood. So I was an extremely angry, fearful , and anxious kid. I remember thinking that I had to quit these behaviors and get a grip. I know I am powerless over addiction, so one day at a time makes me more responsible to do everything I can do to stay honest and work the steps and choose to bear the hard stuff that I used to act-out over. Unfortunately I didn't continue to go to Al Anon. It remains a central part of my recovery work today. Have you had any relapses? I sometimes feel isolated and alone, and that there still is as much social stigma about women being sex addicts as there has been historically about women being open about having sex.
Video about dr kerr sex addication:
One Woman Opens Up About Her Journey Through Sex Addiction
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